Soulstice Searchings

This is my first Solstice/holiday season away from Bellingham ( aside from a trip to NYC one december and a memorable trip to Skagway, Alaska during the summer solstice of 2010.) It doesn't become completely dark here until 6pm.... a much kinder solstice than what I am used to with 4:30 darkness in Washington. I just took a bath in the most amazing tub, while journaling and reading "Wacky Chicks: Life Lessons from Fearlessly Inappropriate and Fabulously Eccentric Women." I highly recommend it. http://www.amazon.com/Wacky-Chicks-Fearlessly-Inappropriate-Fabulously/dp/0743243412

As I apply to jobs and prepare to move into a rented room, I have been noticing myself shut down more and more. I am listening to these signs that this is not the life I want to live. I desire to be more mobile. To have work that allows me to travel and share my light with the world. To live in different places and experience life, while still having a home base to return to.

I dream of touring with my favorite bands and artists, singing backup, playing rhythm guitar when needed, and generally fluffing the crowd up and having a good time. I dream of finding balance on the road, having home-bases along the way with friends, and having "retreat" days planned along the way at hot springs and at friend's homes. I can see myself as a motivational speaker, bringing an important message schools and universities around the country. At the recommendation of friends who travel and speak, I have been thinking about "my story" lately and that I would like to share. I think perhaps I am still so in the midst of it that I am not able to see clearly right now.Essentially, I dream of making a living doing what I love to do: sharing joy and love with beautiful souls, taking care of myself while being active and creative.

In daily life updates, yesterday I spent the day nannying for premie twin boys. They are adorable and brown skinned little Indian boys. One of them was fussy and teething, and he woudn't sleep unless I held him. So I got paid to take a nap with the cutest baby ever. Not the most effective birth control.....

After being covered in drool and baby snot, I changed into a blue dress and headed to Flipnotics for my first gig in Austin. I didn't think anyone would show.... and actually there was a great turn out of sweet friends! I almost cried it was so sweet.

While I still don't have a job and am struggling to make it, I know everything is going to be okay, brighter days are on the way, and I have two musical gatherings to attend this christmas where I get to meet new people. Yay for stepping out of my comfort zone every day!